SUNDAY, April 14, 1912 (cont'd)
Mika
stomped her way back to her stateroom, more angry with herself than anything.
She should have realized how foolish she would sound in a time when even
airborne machines were still in their infancy. She sighed and decided that she
would just have to try to be present when Murdoch's time came.
When
she reached her room, Mika found a slip of paper stuffed beneath the door. She
picked it up and read it, already guessing who had left it. It was from Andrews.
He wrote that he was sorry to have missed her, but if it was not too late when
she read the note, she could come to his room, cabin A26.
Mika
opened the door to the suite and looked about for any sign of the Doctor.
Finding none, she checked the clock on the mantle for the time. Eleven o'clock.
She was beginning to run out of time. Leaving the note on the coffee table, she
went into her bedroom and switched on the light. She called to Lisette to make
sure the maid was not around, then, taking the key from around her neck, entered
her TARDIS. Here she changed clothes, foregoing the period costume for a more
practical suit of Space Fleet issue body armour. What looked like nothing more
than a matte black skin tight cat suit, was actually the best in personal battle
protection. The armour was lightweight, formfitting, bullet-proof,
temperature-regulated, and, most importantly, watertight. She then pulled on a
pair of knee-high armoured space boots and a long, heavy woollen coat to conceal
it all.
When
her transformation was complete, she looked and felt more like her old self.
Pulling her hair back tightly into a ponytail, Mika then made her way to the
control room and, finding that her controls were no longer locked, began setting
coordinates. Through with this task, she went back out into her stateroom and
made on last look around to make sure she had not left anything behind.
Satisfied, she re-entered the TARDIS and dematerialized.
Before
long, a whining, grinding sound could be heard near the aft end of the starboard
promenade deck. When it ceased there now stood what looked like a very small
storage building in the style of the rest of the ship. The door in the side
opened a crack and Mika's head poked through. She quickly surveyed her
surroundings, and finding no one around, stepped out onto the deck. She
carefully pulled the door to the TARDIS to, noting somewhat concernedly that she
had materialized precariously near the ship's edge. No matter, she did not plan
to leave it there long.
Continuously
keeping one eye open for any sign of the Doctor, Mika made her way hurriedly
through the interior of A Deck, looking for cabin A26. She knew that this was
one of the last minute additions that Ismay had ordered made before the
Titanic's first voyage. She soon found it: the second cabin on the left just
past the forward Grand Staircase. Taking a deep breath, she knocked on the door.
After waiting a few moments with no answer, she knocked a little harder. The
door to the first cabin opened and one of Andrews' fellow engineers stuck his
head out to see what was going on. Mika shot him a warning glance and continued
to knock.
"Thomas,"
she called out, "it's me, Mika. I need to talk to you. Please let me
in."
Finally,
the door opened. "Mika, how good to see you, please come in." He
stepped aside to allow her through, casting a dismissive glance at his colleague
who was by now very curious. Andrews then followed her inside, closing the door
behind him.
"I'm
very sorry for leaving you standing out there, but I was working on my notes and
must have dozed off."
"That's
quite all right," she said distractedly. She turned to look at the clock on
the table. Eleven twenty-five. Almost no time left.
"Mika,
there's something I feel I ought to tell you," Andrews started to say, but
thought better of it when he noticed that she was paying no attention to him.
She just stood there, transfixed by the clock. He could sense the urgent panic
that emanated from the Time Lord. He began to worry.
"Thomas,"
she began, "there's something I have to tell you, and you're not going to
like it."
"Mika,
what is it? What is wrong?"
She
looked at his handsome face, now clouded with concern. She had a million things
to say and only fifteen minutes to say them. Yet no words would come out.
Finally, she just rushed up to him and hugged him tightly.
"Oh,
Thomas," she said at last. "You do love me, don't you?"
He
hesitated slightly, but it went unnoticed by Mika. "Of course, my dear, of
course I do. But what's this all about? What has happened to cause you to be so
distraught?"
She
pulled away and looked back to the clock. Then she cast her gaze over the
objects on the table: blueprints of the Titanic, spread out, being held down by
a wine glass, half full, a cigar case, a set of callipers. His notebook was also
lying open on the table, where he had been meticulously making notes on
modifications he would implement when they returned to England. With a sad
symbolism, she closed the notebook.
"It's
not what has happened, Thomas, but what will happen."
"What
are you talking about?" A glint of realization spread across his features.
"Did you have another one of your visions?"
"Not
exactly." She bowed her head then began to speak. "Thomas, I have a
confession to make."
Before
she could continue, Andrews interrupted her. "You're not married, are
you?" he asked anxiously.
Mika
laughed out loud. "If only it were that simple. No, I am not now nor ever
have been married ('and never will be by the looks of things', she added in her
mind)." She shot a glance at the time: 11:35, only five minutes left before
all hell broke loose. "Look, we haven't much time. I am not Mika Smith. My
name is Mikanostinocolai and I am a Time Lord: a time traveller from another
planet. There is no time to explain, but I know the future and it is not very
good."
Andrews
was not sure whether he believed who this woman was or not, but if there was
even the remotest chance of any harm befalling his ship and its passengers and
crew, she had his complete attention.
"Are
you telling me that something is going to happen to this ship?"
"Yes."
"But,
I fail to understand, what could possibly happen?"
Mika
began to grow impatient and angry. There were only seconds left.
"Several
things. You humans all think you're so smart don't you? If you were, you would
never allow all the things that have led up to this tragedy to happen in the
first place."
"Like
what? Please tell me what is going to happen?"
She
ignored his plea and continued her diatribe.
"Like
declaring this ship unsinkable for a start. And not having enough lifeboats for
everyone on board. Using low-quality steel, travelling too fast, ignoring ice
warnings from other ships. Need I go on?"
His
voice dropped to barely above a whisper. "How did you know about the steel?
That's what you and the Doctor were doing in the engine room. I should have
guessed you were spies all along."
Mika
spun around and shook her fists at him vigorously. "Damn it man, how many
times do I have to tell you, we are not spies. We are travellers in time. We
have been to the future and know what is to happen."
Just
then, they felt a shudder. The objects on the table began to bounce slightly and
the chandelier above them tinkled softly.
Now
Andrews was beginning to be frightened. "What was that?"
Mika
looked at the clock. 11:42. "So the reports were off by two minutes,"
she muttered.
"An
iceberg," she said matter-of-factly. "The Titanic has struck an
iceberg."
Andrews
was dumb struck. This could not be happening. "And you knew this all along
yet did nothing to prevent it?" It was his turn to be angry.
"You
don't understand. History can only be observed, even participated in. But the
course is set, there is no changing it."
He
turned away, amazed and shocked at what was happening around him. He was used to
a sane, ordered world. He did not know how to handle the unexpected.
"How
long do we have?" he asked, dreading the answer.
"According
to reports, Titanic is completely gone by 2:20 am. So, about two and a half
hours."
"My
God," was all he could say. "Do you realize what this means?"
Her
voice was short and brusque. "Of course I know what this means. It means
that 1553 people are going to lose their lives tonight and we are powerless to
prevent any of it."
"But
you knew! You could have warned somebody or something!"
"Even
though I knew it would make no difference, I did try. Only, no one would believe
me. See? History cannot be changed. Period."
The
look of pain on Andrews' face told Mika that he still was not convinced.
"Thomas,"
she took his hands in hers and spoke gently. "Do you think I'm such a
monster that I would stand by and let 2200 people suffer if there was anything I
could possibly do to prevent it? Do you think I want to watch these people
die?" She paused, trying to suppress the lump that was rising in her
throat. Her voice dropped to a whisper. "Do you think I want to watch you
die?"
He
knew she spoke the truth, he just did not want to believe it. He shut his eyes
and pulled her tightly to him, hugging her closely as if together they could
simply disappear from this nightmare.
"What
about you?" he asked, quietly.
"Don't
you worry about me. I can look after myself. I'm a time traveller, remember? I
have my own ship and can leave safely when the time comes."
She
looked up into his dear, grief-stricken face and took a chance. "Come with
me, Thomas. We can leave here together. Alive. We can travel the universe; be
together forever."
He
looked at her, uncertain about anything at the moment. Just then there was a
rapping at the door. He pulled away from Mika and answered it. It was a steward
with a message from the Captain to come to the bridge immediately. When the
steward had gone, Andrews, still somewhat dazed, began to move about the room,
gathering up plans and putting away instruments.
"I
have to go do what I can," he said to no one in particular.
"Thomas,"
she grabbed his arm. He froze in his tracks. "I'm going to help too, do
whatever I can to help evacuate the passengers before I leave. Just think about
what I said, all right?"
Without
a word, he shrugged on his overcoat and, gathering his things, stepped out into
the hallway. Mika just stood there and watched him, knowing there was nothing
more she could say. He walked a few paces then paused and turned for one last
look at the woman he loved right now more than anything. The look in her eyes
almost made him agree to leave with her right then and there. But he knew he
could not. Not yet, anyway.
"I
have a job to do. It is my duty to the passengers and crew who have put their
trust in me and my work. I have to go."
"I
know," she said simply, the sadness unmistakable in her calm, quiet voice.
"I love you, Thomas. I always will. Remember that."
He
just nodded, then turned and hurried away.
Mika
watched him go, heaving a huge sigh. "Give me a good battle with a Dalek
anytime. This emotional stuff is exhausting," she said aloud to herself.
Then she noticed the passengers that had come out into the hallway in various
stages of dress to investigate the shudder they had felt. Some of them were
looking at her strangely.
"What
are you people waiting for?" she addressed them in a loud, authoritative
voice. "Go on and put your life belts on. Captain's orders. Go on!"
After
the Captain's order for life belts to be donned had actually been given, Mika
made her way through the growing crowd of confused passengers looking for, not
only the Doctor, but Molly Brown. She found her friend near the Grand Staircase
on B Deck, handing out her fur coats to people to keep them warm outside.
"Mika!"
she called when she caught sight of the Time Lord. "Do you know what's
going on?" she asked hurriedly. "Is it serious?"
Mika
pulled Molly aside and spoke quietly, telling her what had happened. "Yes,
Molly, it is very serious indeed. Make your way to the closest boat and don't
hesitate. Try to get as many people to go with you as possible. But do it
quietly. The last thing we want to do is start a panic."
Unbeknownst
to Mika, Andrews was, at that same moment, on the other side of the crowd that
surrounded them telling Rose and Cal pretty much the same thing.
Also
unbeknownst to her, the Doctor was sitting in his TARDIS control room, drinking
a cup of hot cocoa, while watching all the activity unfold itself before him on
the scanner screen. "I know it seems cold and heartless to leave her out
there all alone," he explained to nobody. "But it is for her own
good." He did not sound very convinced, even to himself.
After
seeing Molly and Lisette off in one of the first of the lifeboats to be
launched, Mika put most of her time left on the doomed Titanic to good use,
calming down hysterical passengers, both men and women, and helping them into
the lifeboats. She was working towards the centre of the boat deck on the
starboard side where she could keep an eye on Mr. Murdoch as he bustled about
doing his duty. At one point, she ran into Chief Officer Wilde while helping to
unstick one of the ropes supporting a lifeboat. She was sadly impressed when,
even in the midst of the horrible tragedy unfolding all around them, he still
had a bright, cheery smile for her. How she truly wished she could save them
all. But she was doubtful that she would be able to save even one.
It
was while helping passengers into collapsible boat C that she felt someone grab
her from behind and try to put her into the boat. She turned to yell at the
person to stop and found herself face to face with Bruce Ismay.
"Mr.
Ismay. Please let me go. I do not wish to take up needed space in the
lifeboats."
But
Ismay would not be put off so easily. He was a gentleman after all. "Please
get in the boat, Miss Smith. It's your only chance of surviving."
Mika
was actually taken aback at this man's unexpected courtesy and bravado. He had
been helping wherever he could all night long. He was exhausted and freezing,
clad only in pyjamas and dressing gown. Please, Mr. Ismay. I insist. I have my
own way off the ship. I give you my spot."
He
looked at her in disbelief. "What?"
"That's
right, go on, get in the boat yourself. I am giving you my spot. And, rest
assured, that I will make it off safely in my own way. All right?"
At
this point, Ismay was so distraught and exhausted that he was easily persuaded
into just about anything. Making sure there were no other passengers to be
loaded, he climbed into the boat, turning his back to the whole tragic mess for
what he hoped would be forever.
Back
in the TARDIS, the Doctor chuckled softly to himself at how beautifully Mika
handled the whole Ismay thing. Now, he thought, comes the really difficult bit.
Mika
was caught up in the rush and panic of the struggling throng of passengers when,
suddenly she felt faint. The deck seemed to spin beneath her as it lurched
sickeningly, catching some people off balance and tossing them overboard into
the freezing water of the North Atlantic. For a moment, she was disoriented,
seeming to not know where she was or what was going on. Then she steadied
herself and realized that she had seen all this before . . .
"Will!"
she exclaimed and began pushing and shoving her way back towards the part of the
bow that was still above water. That was where her vision was to play itself
out. She just desperately hoped that she would make it there in time.
Mika
found him hopelessly trying to maintain order in the midst of chaos as the last
boat on this side, collapsible boat A, was being loaded. Widespread panic had
engulfed the entire ship and men were trying to force their way into any boat
possible. The crowd around the last boat was thickening and Murdoch was waving
his revolver in the air, fearing a rush.
"Women
and children first! Get back, all of you! I'm warning you for the last
time!" he was shouting. He fired two warning shots into the air as an
exclamation point to his words. Mr. Wilde was trying to help, holding men back
while helping the few remaining women forward. But one frantic man climbed upon
the rigging and tried to jump Murdoch from the side. Instinctively and in
self-defense, the officer turned and fired at the man, wounding him in the leg.
As a result, the crowd surged forward and another man was pushed forward.
Murdoch, instinctively turned and fired, taking this for another attack. The man
fell dead at his feet, having been shot squarely in the chest.
Murdoch
was horrified, he never meant to kill anybody; his duty was to protect the
passengers not shoot them down like common criminals. The crowd around him drew
back in a nervous silence. An Italian man was cradling the body of his friend in
his arms and cursing Murdoch in his native language. Lapsing into a state of
shock, the First Officer stepped back slowly from the stream of blood that
flowed down the tilted deck towards him like an accusatory finger, pointing at
its murderer. Mika watched in frozen horror as the events from her vision played
out before her.
Then
everything seemed to shift to slow motion as Murdoch saluted his fellow officers
nearby and pointed the gun at his own head. As in a dream, Mika heard Mr. Wilde
shout, "No, Will!" as Murdoch tightened his finger on the trigger. The
next thing she knew, a shot rang out and time seemed to restore itself.
Mika
found herself standing in front of Murdoch, his wrist in her vice-like grip,
trying to wrench the gun free from his hand. The bullet had missed, but only by
a hair's breadth. His frightened eyes met hers, searching for an answer. She
pulled the gun from his hand and tossed it into the water. Then she pulled him
aside to allow the other officers to load the boat.
"Will,"
she tried to focus his attention, to prevent him from going into shock.
"Will, it wasn't your fault. You were frightened." His eyes began to
wander. "Will, listen to me." She grabbed him by the arms and shook
him. Slowly he began to register her presence.
"Mika?"
he mouthed. "I..."
"I
know, Will, I know. You didn't mean to, it just happened. It's all right."
His eyes grew misty. Mika pulled him to her and hugged him tightly. "It's
all right now. You'll be all right. I'll take good care of you, I promise."
She
let go and looked at him, gently touching her hand to his cheek. "Are you
all right now? Will you come with me then?" Slowly he nodded. Mika then
took him by the hand and began to lead him away. Calmly, they made their way
through the crowd, down to the A Deck promenade, towards her time capsule. They
were almost there when she finally spotted the Doctor through the window to the
first class smoking lounge. Mika immediately turned in her tracks and pushed
through the door, calling after her fellow Time Lord. Murdoch, his head
beginning to clear a little, had no choice but to follow her.
"Doctor!"
she shouted angrily. "Just where the bloody hell have you been?! I've
looked everywhere for you!"
"My
dear, I've been watching you and think you are doing a wonderful job," he
began, but Mika was not listening. Instead her attention was focused on the
figure in the distance. The man was just standing there, by the fireplace,
staring absently at the painting above the mantle.
Waving
the Doctor aside, Mika approached the figure.
"Thomas?
What are you doing here?"
Slowly,
Andrews turned to look at Mika. "Mika? I thought you would be gone by
now."
"You
didn't think I would leave without you?"
"You
should have. It's over. It's all over. I've failed."
"What
in Rassilon's name are you going on about? Come on, we haven't much time
left."
He
only shook his head and remained where he was.
Mika
looked at him questioningly. "But why?"
He
appeared not to have heard her and fell back to staring at the painting.
It
was then that Mika lost her patience. She was through playing games. "Look,
you're not responsible for this. You did your best, and now it's over. Case
closed. Now, come on, before it's too late!"
Still
he remained motionless.
"Bloody
smegging hell!" she exclaimed as she grabbed his hand and began to bodily
drag him away.
Andrews'
voice was soft, but it froze her in her tracks. "Mika, stop. I am not
coming with you."
She
let go and looked him straight in the eyes.
"I
can't leave here, knowing that all these others, people who trusted me and my
creation, died because of my failures. Yes, and the failures of others."
Mika
folded her arms and shut her eyes, trying desperately to contain her emotions.
"But
it's not your fault!" she repeated.
"But
it is," he countered. Andrews approached her and took her hands in his.
"You see, I could have pushed for more lifeboats, but chose not to. And, I
knew about the steel. I could have put a stop to that too, but I didn't. It is
my fault Mika, and I cannot leave here and continue my life in peace knowing
that the souls of 1500 people will always be haunting me, their needless deaths
on my shoulders. Do you understand now?"
Mika
was struggling to keep her emotions in check. "Yes," she managed to
whisper. "I understand, I suppose. I don't agree, but I understand."
She
took a deep breath and opened her eyes. There were no tears.
"So,
I guess this is good-bye, then."
"Mika,
I'm sorry...."
"Right."
She pulled her hands away and turned to leave.
"Wait!"
he called to her. She paused, but did not turn around. "I do love you,
truly I do."
"Yeah,
yeah, whatever," she waved her hands dismissively. "Tell it to someone
who gives a damn." She continued on.
"Mika!"
he called again. "Have you no heart even to bid a dead man good-bye?"
Slowly
she turned, her eyes meeting his, her voice cold and distant.
"No,
I do not, for you will be carrying it with you to your cowardly grave."
They
stared at one another, eyes locked in a battle of duelling wills, while all
around them objects succumbed to the forces of gravity as the mighty ship sank
ever further beneath the unforgiving waves.
Mika
spoke first. "I offer you life, yet you choose to refuse it. I've done all
I can. The matter is at an end. I'm leaving now." She turned and continued
on her way. "Good-bye, Thomas Andrews. It was nice while it lasted."
With
that she grabbed Murdoch by the hand and hurried out of the room, the First
Officer in tow. The Doctor watched in silent sorrow as Andrews merely hung his
head, oblivious to the sea water that began to lap at his feet.
"Will
she be all right?" he asked the Doctor.
The Time Lord put his hands in his pockets and absently traced the pattern in the carpet with the toe of his shoe. "Oh, don't you worry about Mika, she can take of herself. Her heart may be broken, but she's got three more." He looked Andrews straight in the eye. "Now, tell me the real reason you wouldn't go."